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Posts Tagged ‘Maitreya’
Monday, September 6th, 2010
The young woman whom I had given a reading was an incredibly sensitive young woman. She had needed to be held and loved, and when she had allowed someone to do that to her, she was “used,” in a way, and then discarded. I know, of course, that it was a past-life situation. Mine had also been a past-life situation, but it had not been easy for this very sensitive young woman, and she had done things similar to what I had done as a way of getting back. However, just like me, it did not serve a positive outcome; it rarely does.
In the last 42 years since my first daughter was born, I have had much opportunity to look at the way our emotions react and how we allow them to do so. We are all looking for love, every one of us. Some of us are lucky in that we get it from our parents. Others find a partner who feels the same way, but most of us live in relationships that are not two-sided. We stay in them for comfort, convenience, fear, but very rarely are we true to ourselves. As I aged, I came to the realization that I should have left my first husband 10 years prior to when I did. My second husband I should have parted 5 years before I left, but I did not do so because of fear. The first time I had young children. How would I cope? live? etc.? The second time I was comfortable. Everyone else could see the marriage was not working except me. However, it took 5 years for me to finally see it. With my second marriage there was no love really. It was a marriage of convenience, but I was so busy and so wrapped up in my life that it covered up the fact that there was no love. It is that also which often deceives us. We do not have love, so we work instead because it fills that hole which is waiting for something called love. With Alan, whatever love is, it is there and I no longer crave it.
Continued…..
Tags: Alan McElroy, comfort, convenience, emotions, fear, love, Maitreya, Margaret McElroy, marriage, past life, reading, realization, relationships, sensitive
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Sunday, September 5th, 2010
It was only after the baby – a little girl – was born and I was in the hospital all alone that I began to become aware of my actions, what I had done, and how obsessive I had been. Whether it was Spirit or just my awareness that I created it I do not know, but I became aware of my need for affection and love. I looked back over the 5 years of being with Pete and came to the realization that I was the one who had pursued the whole affair. He was too weak to fight me or too frightened. I could not blame the baby and what happened to him; it was all my doing. I could have had an abortion, but no, I was going to make him suffer or want to be with me again. The moment I became aware of my own folly and of what I had done I was mortified. I felt ashamed, guilty, and after the adoption had taken place, I wrote him a long letter telling him I did not blame him. He wrote back and said he had to get married. Cathy, his girlfriend, was pregnant and basically he was, in a way, asking me to go back with him.
Of course, I didn’t. A year later I married the man who was in the army, but this time my relationship was different. When we were courting before we married, I did not allow myself to become obsessed with him. We wrote to each other for some time before we got married as he was overseas. I had grown enormously, and my life was different because of that growth. I was no longer desperate for love, but I was witnessing people around me who were. I could recognize their issues because of what I had gone through myself. Forty years later I was again looking at the same syndrome with the beautiful young woman sitting before me.
Continued…..
Tags: affection, Alan McElroy, ashamed, awareness, baby, growth, guilty, love, Maitreya, Margaret McElroy, married, obsessive, pregnant, relationship, Spirit
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Saturday, September 4th, 2010
When we met a few days later, he told me he wanted to end our relationship. He no longer wanted to go out with me and had, in fact, got another girlfriend! I was devastated. Forty-two years ago I was still so afraid of my father and mother finding out about my being pregnant. How was I going to deal with this? I was only eight weeks pregnant when I told Pete, and during the next week I found accommodation with a friend and moved out of my home, my parents not even knowing anything was wrong. After I left, I sent them a letter which apparently really affected both of them. Meanwhile, I was doing everything I could to be near or around Pete. I lived a fantasy where he would come back and apologize to me – beg for forgiveness – and we would be happy ever after. His new girlfriend was with him everywhere he went; it was difficult for me to see him with her. She could not have cared less about me or the fact that I was pregnant. She seemed to gloat that she now had my boyfriend.
One night I went out to a social gathering and he was there on his own, so I took a pint pot of beer and threw it over him. Then I walked out. It did not bring him back. In fact, as my pregnancy progressed, he wanted nothing to do with me. Neither did his large family whom I had known for the five years we were together. I had visited their home, eaten at their table, and attended many family gatherings. I had left my friend’s house and was living in an apartment in the hope he would come back, but it was a wasted effort. I was not focused on the baby, only on me and getting Pete back. I made a decision to have the baby adopted at birth. Forty-two years ago one could not raise a child alone, and I was alone. My parents came around in the end, but at the time they did not want me back home with or without a baby.
Continued…..
Tags: Alan McElroy, baby, Maitreya, Margaret McElroy, pregnant, relationship
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Friday, September 3rd, 2010
Not only did I become obsessed with him, I could not let him go either. Our courtship – if you can call it that – was my making him feel guilty if he wanted to end the relationship. Year after year, we would break up and, for a few weeks, we would go our own way. But in my own way, I would make sure that I went where he was. I made myself look sweet and innocent – which was the kind of look he liked and which had attracted him to me in the first place. If I could not be where he was, I got friends who were there to talk about me. I clung to him, and he could not escape me. I never wondered if he was happy with me. I assume he was to a degree because he did stay with me, but I never thought it might be out of pity or because he felt guilty. I was wrapped up in my own obsession.
After a few weeks it had become a sexual relationship, and in that sexual side I found the love I had not received at home – which made me even more obsessed. The years went by, and one year I met another man during a time apart from Pete. I found another “soul mate,” but he was in the army and was away most of the year. Finally, after 5 years of courtship and my constant nagging for a ring on my finger, Pete bought me a necklace. It shut me up for a while, but I kept hoping. I could not see that I was really not happy. On one of our times apart he had gone out with someone else, and it made me so jealous of him. Thankfully, it did not last, but I became like a woman obsessed over this incident. Shortly after this, I found myself pregnant. I was 21 years of age and terrified. Of course, I thought “Now he will marry me.” I told him one night at a bus stop before going home as he kissed me goodnight. I have never seen anyone in such shock!
Continued…..
Tags: Alan McElroy, courtship, love, Maitreya, Margaret McElroy, obsession, pregnant, relationship
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Thursday, September 2nd, 2010
Through my work I am constantly being confronted with memories and reminders of my past. One of my clients this week was a beautiful young woman who had been through a difficult time with a man she had a relationship with. She reminded me so much of myself at a certain time in my life, but it also brought home to me how emotional we are in our lives. I will call this person Mary for the sake of giving a name to her. She had been living with a flat mate and had a sexual relationship with him. They were not courting as such but, once it was over, he did not seem to want to know her anymore. She, in turn, became obsessed over him, so obsessed that she did some terrible things to him. He, in turn, thought she was mentally ill which, of course, she was not, but because she was so upset over his treatment of her, her only thought was to hurt him.
As I was talking to her, I was taken back over 40 years to an experience of my own. I had been going out with my boyfriend for 5 years. Looking back, how we lasted 5 years I honestly do not know. I was a very insecure woman in my teens and I met him when I was 16. I got no love at home and had been brought up with a father who told me constantly that I was stupid, a thickhead, a block head, and other such names. I bit my nails, hardly spoke to anyone, and because I hated myself, I was a “cutter.” I cut myself on my body as if to make myself more ugly! I met Pete (his name) and, from the first date, it was so amazing because he was just so wonderful. I received no love at home and never had but, from the moment Pete put his arms around me, I felt protected and wonderful. This was it, I told myself. My whole life revolved around him and, after a few weeks, I became obsessed with him.
Continued…..
Tags: Alan McElroy, emotional, insecure, love, Maitreya, Margaret McElroy, memories, obsessed, past, relationship
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Wednesday, September 1st, 2010
The most amazing thing to me is that I only need to hear the voice and I know the soul. In some instances, I can even do it via e-mail. I used to have to work through spirit guides in the beginning, then a Master, Maitreya. But now I seem to work on a higher level. The accuracy of my work blows me away and, at the end of a day of doing these readings, I am in as much shock as those who have had them. It is then, when I am doing readings, that I can see where you are in denial and not living or speaking your truth.
However, it is one thing for me to tell you, but another for you to put it into being and address the issue. Eighty percent choose not to do so, and then, eventually, the Universe will create a situation for them to look at it. Often that situation can be very brutal – like when I denied my intuitive ability and would not use it year after year despite the Universe bringing everything into my life to make me see it. It created a recession in which I was the main player. After a few years of being in that situation, I knew what I needed to do, but I had to be brought to my knees first to force me to do it.
That is another form of truth: denying one’s own truth. I think that it is worse than lying to someone else, to be honest. It creates dis-ease in the body and is the forerunner of health problems. I have learned the hard way. One cannot suppress energy. If one tries to do so, one just stops the flow of what the Universe is trying to bring to us. If I could say anything to those seeking higher consciousness, it would be to speak your truth, but also do not lie. It may upset people to speak your truth, but speak it. If they do not like it, it is their problem, nobody else’s. TO THINE OWN SELF BE TRUE!
Tags: Alan McElroy, denial, energy, intuitive, lying, Maitreya, Margaret McElroy, readings, soul, truth, Universe
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Tuesday, August 31st, 2010
I cannot imagine the chaos if every government in the world said, “Speak your own truth.” In the world of Spirit, one does exactly that: speak one’s own truth. One cannot lie. But there is never anything negative spoken because there are no spoken words. All communication is done via thought and on a different level altogether from the earth plane. We have no emotional body when we die, nor is there a Self. It is the Self that creates the drama in conversations and which causes all of the problems. It is only after many years of being a drama queen, finally moving away from it, and seeing it as a waste of energy, that I can see how dramatic I was and how the Self manipulated that drama, even to the fact of telling lies to get its own way.
To be honest, I have difficulty imagining a world where there is no Self, or drama, or emotional body. I told Maitreya once that it must be very boring and dull, and he laughed at me. He told me that it is far from that and that one day I will see for myself. I am really looking forward to that day! Maitreya told me that one cannot lie after one has passed over, and that many of those who pass over find it very difficult to be stripped of that ability. It is only then that they can truly see themselves as they are without the outer layers of emotions that contribute to our life on the earth plane.
I know without a doubt that there is a ruling force, whether you call it God or something else. How else can I know what I know when I do readings? I go to the very core of the person and reveal things to the people I see that I could never have known. One woman told me that I knew her better than she knew herself! A man told me that he was skeptical of intuitive readings until he had his reading. He did not know what to do after having it.
Continued…..
Tags: Alan McElroy, communication, God, intuitive, lie, Maitreya, Margaret McElroy, readings, speak, Spirit, thought, truth
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